To My Boys:
I pray you cry. I know, such a strange prayer. But I hope tears come to your eyes when your future wife walks down the aisle and you whisper to her that you don’t think you can say your written vows because you are so emotional, but then you do. I hope that you get scared when your wife shows you the positive pregnancy test…. not because you aren’t happy but because you know your life is changing. I pray that when you look at your brand-new baby you tear up and can’t wait to tell anyone who will listen all about the amazing things your kids can do. I pray that when you see a stranger baptized you shed a tear. I pray you know how to show your emotions.
I hope you keep a Bible close to your side of the bed, with pages a bit roughed up and a cover that looks like it has been well used. I pray that when you talk to someone you can say that you just heard that verse the other day from some random podcast you listened to. That you skip your kids’ baseball games to go to small group and set the example that your family loves God- no exceptions and no distractions.
I hope you learn to grow something. Maybe giant pumpkins, or maybe a strong career, maybe a loyal friendship, or a beautiful family. I hope you definitely grow your faith. Just something. I pray that you take care of something from its start and see how hard work and patience and research makes whatever it is bloom. That what started so small turns into something big and people take notice.
I hope you take your kids to Disney and say OK to wearing matching shirts. That you stand in line and wait for whatever ride or princess meet and greet your kid wants to see. That you smile for every picture and are always up for taking one more. I hope you take your kids fishing with their friends. That you never need your fishing license because you never get to fish since you are too busy untangling poles, baiting hooks, and taking fish off the lines.
I pray you just nod your head when your wife wants to go out with friends for dinner. That you don’t ever ask where the kids will be. I hope you tuck your kids in those nights with a prayer and kiss. That you figure out dinner and don’t ask what you are eating when she goes out. That even on nights where your wife is there, you make dinner, you give the baths, and you put them to bed while your wife curls up in a chair and reads a book.
I hope you take care of something. That your wife never has to worry about the dishes in the sink or how to mow the grass. That if the trashcan is full you take it out. That if something gets spilled you teach your kids how to clean it up. I pray you teach your kids to take care of their things too. I hope you see the value in taking care of your things and relationships- that by giving them attention they can last longer. I pray too that you learn that just because it is broke doesn’t mean it needs to be thrown away and you can still repair it.
I pray that you learn how to help someone. That if your father-in-law calls at 5:30 in the morning because his car is broke, you don’t hesitate to roll out of bed and fix it. I hope that if your mother-in-law calls on that same day because of a toilet leaking, that you run over to her house after work to see if you can get it to stop. Or if your family needs help moving you ask which day they need help. I pray you help your friend come to know Jesus. I hope you help anyone around you feel valued, loved, and safe.
I pray you work. That you get up each morning and go to a job and give it your all. That if you see something that needs to be done you never say “that’s not my job”. Instead, you just do it. That when you leave work for the day you still think about it. That if an emergency comes up, you show up. I know the world wants you to have a work-life balance. And you should, but I hope that one day you consider your work a part of your life. That you develop a community within it and really want it to succeed.
I hope you are strong. So that if your kid wants to be thrown in a pool you can launch them dangerously high. That if your wife asks for heavy couches to be moved to the top floor you can do it. I pray you never get seriously injured, but if you do get hurt by something (like a concrete saw), you just shake it off and try and cut the grass the day after surgery. I pray you are strong willed enough to give up pop for one year and it stretches into 11 years and counting. I pray your strength comes from somewhere deep within you and that you know, even before you get to the point of exhaustion, that talking to God will make you even stronger.
I hope you tear things down. Another strange prayer. But I hope if there is an obstacle in your way… you tear it down. Maybe that obstacle is a tree in your backyard where your wife wants a pool. Maybe it is a stereotype that someone put on you. Or maybe it is a veil over your relationship with God. I pray you rip that old life away violently and step into the path God is guiding you on. That when the obstacle is removed that you don’t ever look back. I pray that when you tear that something down you build something new in its place. Something better, something stronger, something greater.
Mostly, my prayer and hope is that you become just like your Dad. If you do…. If you turn out just like him….. then you’ve already done all the other things.
